Fondness and admiration, how to get those feelings for your spouse

Instead of pointing out your differences, work together to point out the positive aspects in your marriage. Staying in a positive mindset will help you avoid becoming depressed in your marriage and feeling hopeless about your marriage. Every day think about a positive quality you admire in your spouse and thank them for this quality. Do not let the little things slip by, such as taking out the garbage or putting away the dishes. Keep this positive thought with you throughout the day and be sure to tell your spouse before you go to bed. When you practice remaining in a positive mindset throughout the day, it will be easier to develop fondness and admiration for your spouse.

The Center for Disease Control conducted a three-year study on married adults and unmarried adults and found that married adults are happier, healthier, and wealthier than unmarried adults. The quality of a marriage is the foundation for a happy, healthy home life. Children that are raised in a home where both parents love, respect, admire, and are fond of one another are emotionally and physically healthier. These children also are more likely to succeed academically and less likely to demonstrate behavioral problems.

One of the largest problems married couples face is the inability to respond to one another's emotional needs. Things in a marriage quickly become a habit and it is easy to stop paying attention to the small details. Take time to sit back and find out what your spouse's emotional needs are. Do you truly understand their likes and dislikes? Figure out what they stress about, what they fear, and what brings them joy. Try to spend time being sporadic and surprise them with something that brings them joy. Watch their emotional behavior and discuss things that are on their mind. If they appear stressed, offer to listen to their frustrations. Sometimes people need to vent to someone else about things that are bothering them, without having that person's opinion. Find ways to help your spouse by listening to them.

Every couple will face hard times in a marriage and it is only understandable that every couple will have arguments. During an argument, it is important to give one another time to speak. You must respect each other during an argument and come to a rational agreement. Try to avoid bringing up past arguments and behaviors that you are sill holding against your spouse. Once an argument is over and the problem has been solved, you must let it go. Do not let an argument overtake all the fond memories you have built together. When you focus on the past, talk to each other and remind each other of the positive qualities you admire. When you focus on the happy memories, positive feelings emerge and fondness for your spouse develops.

Couples need to make time to spend together doing enjoyable activities. At least two times a month, a couple needs to make time for a "date night." They need to leave the kids with a babysitter and go out and enjoy being with each other. Spending time talking to one another will help to keep the lines of communication open and can help to re-kindle the romance the marriage may have lost over the years.

It is also important to lean on your spouse during the hard times and the good times. A strong marriage is built upon a partnership. Each spouse will contribute something to the marriage and teach one another different things. When couples break down the emotional walls they tend to put up, they will develop a deeper connection for each other and create feelings of fondness and admiration for one another.

Learn how to admit your mistakes. If you nagged your partner about something that bothered you and you later realized your wrong-doings, go to your partner and apologize. Think before you say things. You need to learn how to accept your partner for their faults and learn how to compromise with them. For example, your partner may have a habit of keeping their shoes on when they come in the home. If you recently vacuumed, you may want your partner to take off their shoes. You should approach them softly instead of saying: "I told you to take off your shoes, you never listen!" If you kindly asked your spouse to remove their shoes and they do not, remove them for them with a soft smile. Your simple gesture is an easy way to remind your spouse to remove their shoes when they come in the home.

Every marriage will face different challenges and difficulties; it is up to the couple to work through the hard times. Creating feelings of fondness and admiration for your spouse will help you remain happily married and maintain a life-long connection to your spouse. No one is perfect and it is important to recognize that you and your spouse will have differences. Despite all the flaws and differences, you need to realize that your spouse is someone that you care for and deserves your admiration and respect.

Happily married couples enjoy being around their spouse and they have fondness and admiration for one another. These simple qualities are often overlooked in a marriage and many people focus on the flaws in their spouse. When a couple develops fondness and admiration for one another, their weaknesses and flaws no longer threaten their relationship. They are able to avoid feelings of contempt and anger toward their spouse. Feelings of anger and contempt will break down the relationship and destroy the friendship the couple has been working on throughout their marriage.

How can you create feelings of fondness and admiration for your spouse? Here are some simple tips to follow:

• Write down all the qualities you admire in your spouse. What attracted you to your spouse to begin with? List as many things you can think of and then write down a time when you noticed your spouse using this quality. Talk with your spouse about the qualities you admire in them and why you respect them for those quality.
• Discuss your history as a couple. How did you meet? When did you realize you were in love with your spouse? Sometimes taking a walk down memory lane together will help you recognize the admiration and fondness you have for your spouse. Couples that can recall the fond memories they have for one another are more likely to stay together.
• Recall incidents that were difficult in your marriage and talk about how you worked through the hard times together. Discuss why you decided to stay together and work things out as a couple. Recall your first year of marriage and the different things you had to adjust to as a couple.

Create goals for the marriage. If both of you have different desires, communicate this with your spouse and ask for their support. You must always create some common goals that will allow you to work together. Realizing your own dreams and the dreams of your spouse will help each of you have a happy marriage. Try to incorporate these goals into your marriage and make them become part of the overall concept of your marriage. Understand why your partner has set these goals and why they feel strongly about certain issues. If the marriage does not honor and respect the goals of both individuals, it will be a rocky relationship. A good marriage will accept the differences of both members and a compromise will be reached when you have opposing views.

When a couple is married, they agree to spend the rest of their lives together. These two people have chosen to share their lives and create a new life together. They each will bring different qualities and aspects to the marriage. Each person will have different dreams and desires for the marriage. Their spouse must trust and respect this person for their dreams and desires and help them achieve them. Marriage needs support from both spouses. When a marriage has a shared meaning from both partners, conflict will not arise as easily as it would without support. The marriage will be meaningful for both partners and they will both find happiness in their marriage.

Establishing trust is a large factor that contributes to a marriage. When a couple develops a deep admiration for one another, they will trust each other. Couples will not worry about their spouse breaking the marriage agreements and they will trust them with any circumstance. Married couples need to spend time talking to one another. Without open lines of clear communication, it will be difficult to understand what their spouse is feeling. Clearly communicating with your spouse will allow you to avoid confusion, which leads to frustration and eventually confrontation.

Spend time talking with your spouse each day and complimenting them for the qualities you admire in them. When a spouse feels accepted and loved, they are happier in their marriage and work harder at creating a good marriage.